The Internet Stock Dream
written by Jim Berry
The Stock Market is going wild with projections on Internet Companies. There is no basis in reality for what is going on but the "DREAM" is promulgating.

Eventually the lawmakers will step in and put a halt to what will wind up as a mess.

There will be Congressional Hearings. Name calling. Indictments. Bed partner exposures. Prosecutions. Lawsuits.

Can we have a little music with this so that it doesn't get boring for the older generations who have heard this same thing before. At least the music won't hurt anyone and - well - it's just more enjoyable.

It will provide an excellent media event. The new millennium fiasco.

The game will go on until, at just the right time, the lawmakers go on TV and make their proper & respective presentations. Long live these umpires! They are our guardians of justice.

Can I put it in it's simplest form - the books don't balance!

Price earnings ratios are all over the map. One slight "tickle" and the lawmakers will just be waiting in the background to go on TV to expose the debasing of the Market.

Can we have a sound bite that works - please?

Put a little more white eye shadow under these baggy eyes - I would never want to look like Nixon did on TV.

Sweat only looks good in the gym.

Why do we always turn outward for an answer when the answer comes from within?

Making the Big Buck doesn't exist on this planet. There are always people there to take it away.

The Big Buck has been presented over and over again - restructured, recategorized, remarketed, reborn, reinvented, re-sizzled, and re do be do be doed.

Do I really have to swallow it again...Ma?

Don't you think the Market Makers know exactly what you're thinking when they do a "yellow brick road" on projections?

No problem though...they're only projections. Unfounded, unguaranteed, wild & crazy, Big Buck projections.

Can't fault a guy for that!

I feel like I'm going to last year's hit play on Broadway. The greasepaint is stale and smells by the next morning, never mind by the following year.

Can't we put a few decades between these scenarios? Very old reruns are a novelty because we've had some chance to forget.

The names change, there are new faces, the scenery is a little different, but it's the SAME OLD STORY!

I guess that's why they've given us remotes for the TV. We still have a little power.